Syntropy Alive: A Living Practice

On birth portals, purpose, listening deeply, and the pulse of new Life.

If you're intrigued by this post, I invite you to learn more on my website SyntropyAlive.com

So far, 2025 has felt like a year of quiet emergence — of long-held threads weaving themselves into something whole, alive, and real. If you’ve been following my journey over the last several years, you know that in 2022 I took a big leap and left my academic job without much of a plan for what was next. At the time, I had a toddler and a baby, so admittedly, my hands and heart were very full. Years later, my children continue to fill my days with joy and challenge — along with an ever growing desire for more presence, aliveness, and purpose in every part of my life.

Like many mothers, my children are my world — and, they are also just a part of the much larger landscape of who I am. As my children have become more independent, and as I’ve devotedly worked to replenish my own energy systems after growing two humans, I’ve spent the last several years turning toward a vision that has long been with me but that crystallized after their births.

Something opened in me after becoming a mother — a listening that hadn’t been available before. I often say that when a child is born, a portal opens to the Divine. Energetically and spiritually, there is a profound flooding of light that rushes through the portal at the time of birth. The child, of course, comes through into this material world, but the mother too lingers in the portal, and can continue to dance with that divine creative energy for weeks and months after the birth.

It is a time to listen deeply. A time when the soul speaks.

Resting in the postpartum is not only important for physical healing and bonding — it’s also essential for keeping this channel open. To stay quiet enough to hear the wisdom pouring through. What makes this time so unique, though, is that it’s not a time for action. It’s a time for receiving. The years that follow are meant for implementation and taking action on what was revealed.

After both of my own births, the message was clear: Devote yourself to our collective healing and remembering.

The message didn’t arrive with a detailed plan — just a clear, persistent knowing. A compass pointing toward a path that was asking to be followed. And so, step by step, I began to feel my way forward — like a tracker following the subtle signs of Life. Each step was guided by a quiet certainty — not the certainty of some specific outcome, but a deep trust in the unfolding, a faith that the path would reveal itself as I moved.

Along the way, it became clear that my children were not only part of the path — they were illuminating it. Children bring so many gifts. As I’ve tracked both in my own life and in the lives of so many friends and clients, I’ve seen how they expand our vessels and redirect us toward purpose. One of the conversations I find myself having again and again — with friends, clients, and in my own heart — is about the reorganization of priorities that happens after a child is born.

What once seemed essential no longer holds the same weight. New insights, longings, and possibilities begin to emerge. Glimmers that once flickered quietly now shine with clarity.

Long before becoming a mother I had been leading and immersing myself in healing and transformational spaces. This work wasn’t paying my bills, but it was deeply nourishing me and igniting something authentic within. Most importantly, it was guiding me toward a deeper sense of purpose. In the dreamy, psychedelic weeks after my second birth, there was no denying the direction that was calling me.

So I’ve spent the last several years deeply immersed in my own studies — learning with brilliant teachers, mentors, and healers — and most importantly, doing my own inner work to clear the traumas and residue from my nervous system so that I can show up in full presence with others. I’ve been connecting the dots, making sense of expanded states and mystical experiences from long ago, and learning techniques for opening the flow of life force energy within the human body and psyche.

I’ve devoted myself to understanding the female body, the female nervous system, and the anatomy and physiology of pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and the cyclical nature of the feminine. In conjunction with the teachings I’ve received, I’ve worked with my own body and the content of my own lived experience to construct a deeper understanding of how Life unfolds and creative energy moves — physically, energetically, and spiritually animating our reality.

Over the last two years, I’ve also had the tremendous privilege of witnessing and supporting another kind of birth: the creation of my husband’s business, from nothing to something. I’ll always remember the moment he said, “I have an idea.” In my body, I felt the same somatic knowing I had when my children were conceived. A spark. A microscopic flash of light—like the one that occurs when a sperm enzyme activates the egg. I often refer to his business as our third child, because it feels just like that: delicate, needy, requiring so much love, time and attention — but slowly becoming more steady, more independent.

In many ways, I’ve been holding space for this birth just as I did for the others — tending to the unseen, offering presence, and trusting the timing. Birthing a business, like birthing a human, is an act of devotion. It begins as energy, as vision, as a whisper from the unknown — and slowly takes shape through care, labor, and love. It is one of the most potent expressions of creative life force I know — a reminder that creation is not a single moment, but a slow, steady becoming. And while holding space for his unfolding vision, I have been quietly nurturing my own.

Amidst caring for our two human children and sustaining the foundation of our home life, I’ve been midwifing something else into being: the slow, steady birth of my own practice. What began as quiet sessions with a few clients has grown into a living, breathing offering — shaped by everything I’ve lived, studied, remembered, and become.

And now, I feel excited to share more. Not just about what I do, but why I do it. What’s woven into the work — and the pulse that moves through it.

Syntropy Alive

There is a deep and abiding vitality within each of us. Every breath we take is evidence of this life force, conspiring on behalf of our wholeness, our well-being, our becoming. This vitality is not something we earn — it is intrinsic. But over time, it often gets layered over with trauma, contraction, and cultural conditioning that teaches us to override, ignore, or control our most instinctual impulses.

We live in a world that often defines order as control — a quieting of the storm, a tidying of the chaos. But the science of emergent systems remind us that true order isn’t something imposed from the outside. It arises from within. What may look like disorder on the surface is often the beginning of a deeper rhythm — a system reorganizing itself toward greater coherence.

This is the essence of syntropy — the sacred opposite of entropy. It is the quiet pull of life toward more complexity, more harmony, more wholeness. It’s the pulse of the forest rewilding after fire. The nervous system rediscovering its rhythm. The return to our original blueprint — not by fixing what is broken, but by remembering what was never lost.

Healing as Reorganization

As humans we are fundamentally rhythmic, self-organizing, and self-healing beings. When trauma disrupts this natural rhythm, our systems lose coherence. Our physiology may become fragmented, our capacity to self-regulate diminished, and our aliveness constricted.

Yet, even within this disorganization, the blueprint for wholeness remains. Healing is the movement back toward that wholeness — not a straight line, but a spiral, a wave, a pulse. It involves moving through periods of disarray as the system reorganizes itself into higher and deeper levels of coherence.

This process can look—and feel—uncomfortably messy. But from a wider view, it’s the intelligence of syntropy in motion: the body, the psyche, and the larger field aligning to a greater level of order.

Restoring the Inner Compass

For centuries, we’ve been taught to fear and suppress our inner impulses. The cultural suppression of emotion, intuition, and creative energy has left many of us disconnected from our instincts and believing that control is the only path to safety, or success.

But what if the opposite is true?

What if the very impulses we’ve learned to suppress — our emotions, sensations, dreams, and desires — are not distractions, but the very compass of our healing?

To live in alignment with these impulses is a radical act. It calls us back to something more natural — the way of the sparrow, the bumblebee, the tree growing toward light. Not driven by duty or fear, but by a quiet inner knowing of what feels most vital and alive.

This kind of living — connected, intuitive, embodied — is not only possible. It’s necessary.

Honoring the Essential Self

In a culture that tells us to stay small, be reasonable, and conform, reclaiming our authenticity is a revolutionary act. It asks us to create space for what is deepest and most alive within us — not someday, but now.

That reconnection can happen through movement. Through art. Through deep rest or wild wandering. Through somatic presence. Through the vulnerability of being truly seen by another. Through the simple act of listening deep within, and responding.

When we begin to trust the body’s innate intelligence to emerge — when we stop pathologizing our pain and start seeing it as a portal — we awaken our essential self. We step into a new relationship with Life where our challenges are no longer obstacles to be overcome, but doorways to deeper coherence, truth, and freedom.

Community, Coherence, and Becoming Fully Human

This path is not one we walk alone. To truly reinhabit our bodies, renegotiate trauma, and listen for the emergent order moving through us, we need one another. We need spaces that honor our aliveness. We need support to move through the chaos without shutting it down.

Becoming more fully human is not a private pursuit — it is a collective one. As we each reclaim our rhythms, the collective field reorganizes too. As one body system moves into coherence, it supports others to do the same.

Healing is not just a personal victory. It is a participation in the world’s reorganization. A surrender to the larger story seeking to express itself through us. A remembering of what it means to be part of a living, breathing, intelligent universe.

This is not just healing.

It is re-membering.

It is Syntropy Alive — the ever-unfolding movement toward life, coherence, and freedom that lives within us all.